All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. ~Anatole France
I have big plans for New Years Eve. I plan to let go of 2010 (and some leftover from 2009). I was thinking about making resolutions which is pointless as I generally break them within 5 minutes. 2010 was a hard year for me. There have been a lot of changes in my life in the past couple of years, some good, many not so good. I'm not a person who easily lets go - I brood and worry and wonder what I could have done differently.
So I decided I need a cleansing ritual. Now I have to admit that when the idea first popped into my head it felt weird. I thought I wasn't a person who is "into" rituals. As I thought about it I realized that I love birthdays and Christmas and holidays - all rituals, all ways to celebrate something. My cleansing ritual is going to be a way to celebrate letting go of a lot of stuff that I don't want to carry around anymore. Lots and lots and lots and lots and, well you get the idea, of emotional baggage and worries and fears that I'm tired of holding onto.
I haven't worked out all the details but I'm going to start by cleaning my apartment Friday morning and taking some stuff to Goodwill. I was looking online for ideas and found a suggestion to write the things you're letting go of on a piece of paper and burn them. I'm a bit worried I'll start a bonfire - there's a lot of stuff I need to let go of. But this feels like a good thing to me. Sad, because I'm letting go of people I loved but I'm also letting go of resentments and anger that is only hurting me. In moving to Sacramento I've made a new life for myself. It's been difficult and I imagine it will be in the future but it's my life and I need to give up some things that tied me to an old life.
So that's my plan for New Years Eve. And as I write this memories come creeping in and I wonder if I can really let go. I guess it's ok to cry while you burn the paper?
5 comments:
You CAN let go.
I have a sister/cousin that I haven't talked to in about 25 years. I let the pain of what she did go, right along with letting her go. Yes, she is blood but if she wasn't is she the kind of person I want to spend time with...no. And I don't think of her. Just an example. You can let go and be happy. If it takes a ritual then do it. And start the New Year Happy!!
of course you can cry while you'll let go! actually, i would really expect you to. imo it is a grieving process, even if the things you are letting go of are burdensome. do you need to get a burn permit from the city? lol. j/k. :) let us know how it feels after you've accomplished this. maybe i need to do some burning too. hugs.
Oh thank you both! I felt a little silly about this but I feel better now. I want to start 2011 without any leftover junk and that's what I'm going to do! I'll post on New Years Day about how it went! Hope you both have a fun New Years Eve or just relaxing if you don't have big plans. Happy New Year! I think it's going to be a better year for everyone!
Good Luck! It's a great start! With my yoga practice I've found that once you unload the stuff on the surface there's a ton more buried; most the time you're not even aware that you're holding onto it. I have daily "releases" and it's all good because it makes me a better, happier person. Happy New Year Robin!
Thanks Andrea! Although I don't want to think about what's buried. . .I know that's true though and I may end up releasing things daily for awhile. I want to get rid of all this stuff! Happy New Year to you!
Post a Comment